Turning his turn signal on before slowing down and turning, Damian could feel his stomach getting tighter and tighter with each turn of his wheels. The closer he got to Dillon and Ali’s house the worse his stomach felt. Today would be the first time in close to a month that he agreed to hang out since the fight between him and Terek.
The last thing he’d wanted to do was put them in the middle. So he stayed away. However, one could only hear the hurt in Ali’s voice or see her sad, green puppy eyes before giving in, no matter what she is asking for. It’s one of the reasons Damian has always enjoyed hanging out with her, not to mention she makes him laugh and lord knows he hasn’t laughed since the last time he was at their house.
Since the last time he was there all he has wanted to do was hide and cry. It was irrational and completely unlike him but he couldn’t help it. Depression was hard. He’d spent the last year wishing and dreaming what it would be like to have just one chance, one night, with Terek and now that he had his one night he was miserable.
And it had nothing to do with the sex.
The sex was amazing. It was blow your socks off, out of this world. However, the problem was what happened afterwards. The fight between them. Everything Terek said when he lashed out, especially when he realized Dillon and Ali were awake and could hear them.
Damian had spent the last month hiding at home, at work, hell he was even hiding when he went to the store. Always afraid he’d run into Terek and just what Terek’s response would be. So he hid. He ignored his co-workers when they all asked if he was alright, lying and pretending everything was perfect. Except, it wasn’t.
He didn’t know when the last time he’d slept through the night was or even when he’d been able to eat a full meal. All he wanted to do was sleep and ignore the world. During some of the darker days Damian would have thoughts about moving away once more. Except he knew deep down that running away never solved anything. If he really wanted a chance for happiness with Terek or anyone else, then he needed to pull himself away from the dark clouds.
Hence the reason he gave into hanging out with Ali and Dillon. Damian just hoped they hadn’t invited anyone else tonight as well. As he pulled up to his usual parking spot against the curb, Damian was relieved to find only Ali’s little red car parked behind Dillon’s truck. He knew it didn’t mean there wasn’t anyone else there but he held on to the hope.
Shoving the door open with a sigh, Damian headed up the walk to the door. Knocking on the door before walking in at the twin hollars. “Hey guys, how’s it going?” He asked while taking his normal seat on the loveseat. “Eh, another day another dollar. How are you, man?” Dillon asked from his spot in the recliner.
Not wanting to make his friends feel bad for him, Damian offered a smile before telling a story about something that had happened in the bar the week before causing both of his friends to bust up laughing. It didn’t take long before each of them were trying to out story the other laughing harder and harder with each story until Damian had tears rolling down his cheeks.
How his laughter turned into sobs, Damian would never understand but before he knew what was happening he sat there sobbing with his hands covering his face. It felt as if the dam had been broken and he couldn’t stop. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there crying nor was he sure when both of his friends moved to sit on either side of him. Each with their arms wrapped around him, holding him while offering silent comfort and support.
This was the first time in weeks he’d felt any comfort.
Lifting his head after his tears stopped rolling Damian offered a small smile of thanks to both Ali and Dillon, “I’m sorry guys. I don’t know what came over me.”
“Can I say something, Damian?” Ali asked softly as she handed him the box of tissues from the coffee table. Barely waiting until he nodded his head, she continued, “Dillon and I both agreed we would stay out of this because both of you are our friends but what happened? I knew a long time ago you had a thing for Terek and the fact you guys finally got together… I don’t know… I had hope for the both of you.”
Wait a minute, what was Ali talking about? She knew? How did she know?
Without giving him a moment to ask any questions, Ali continued on. “Sometimes I swear I have a better gaydar than you do. I knew the minute I met you, you went both ways but I don’t care. I have other gay friends. Hell, I even have a friend who is transgender and bi. It honestly doesn’t matter to me. I swear the only reason why it’s such a big deal right now is because both you and Terek are making it a big deal. Quit trying to find a way to come out as bi-sexual, we don’t care who you fuck.”
Staring at his friend in shock, he felt as if a lightbulb had turned on in his head. Damian had always said he didn’t care about labels and yet, here he was to freaked out to not care what people thought about who he fucked. He was just as guilty about putting labels on himself just like most of society. Rather than just living his life without caring about what everyone else thought, Damian hid his attraction to different men instead of owning who he was . Coming to the realization that he was the one putting the pressure and worry on himself was like a weight being lifted off of his shoulders.
“Damn, Ali… I think you missed your calling,” Damian sighed.
Turning his head to look at his friend at the soft touch of her hand on his cheek, Ali softly said, “Damian, all that matters is happiness. Whether you are happy with yourself or not. Whether you and Terek get together and date or if you find someone else who makes you happy. At the end of the day, happiness is all that matters besides love. I believe you can’t have love without happiness so you need to decide what makes you happy and then do it. Quit worrying about everything else and everyone else and just do what you need to do to be happy. Alright?”
Feeling his heart swell with emotion as his throat clogged up, Damian opened his arms to offer a hug to Ali unable to come up with a way to explain just how much she opened his eyes in that very moment. After holding on for a couple of minutes Damian felt calmer and more at ease than he had in months.
“Alright you two, break it up otherwise I might start thinking you have designs on stealing my girl,” Dillon joked, breaking up the moment and all of the emotions. Laughing once more with his friends, Damian pushed his shoulder into Dillon which caused him to fall to the floor as they had all been squished on the love seat together. “You asshole!” Dillon laughed.
“Oh, I’m the asshole, huh? Watch this,” Damian exclaimed before hopping off the couch to start roughhousing with his friend. Each of them were laughing like loons, Noah was barking his head off as he bounced around wanting to play with them. “I swear if you two break my table or anything on it I’m gonna be pissed off,” Ali laughed as she hit each of them with a pillow.
Damian and Dillon stopped their antics long enough to share a look between each other as twin smiles spread across their faces and they sprang apart to attack Ali. Each of them tickling her until she was laughing so hard tears were streaming down her face. “Uncle! Uncle! Alright, you guys win.”
Once everyone calmed down enough to separate and move back to their own chairs Damian looked between his two friends more thankful than he’d ever been to have them both in his life. “So, what’s the plan now?” He asked, breaking up the silence that had descended on the room.
“Well, I think we should order a couple of pizzas and watch a couple of movies and just hang out,” Ali offered as she curled up with her blanket on the main couch.
It didn’t take long before they were all stretched out, comfortable with each other and the silence besides the movie. At one point Dillon had asked if anyone wanted to smoke a bowl but Damian had decided he was done with that for the time being so he had declined, much to their surprise.
As he laid there, Damian’s mind started to wander, going down paths he was sure he’d rather not go but he couldn’t help himself. He thought about different friends over the years, especially the ones who had a thing for straight boys. If he was honest with himself, there was a certain allure to trying to turn a straight man gay, even if only for the night.
Damian wondered how many times over the years had he told his friends to stay away from straight boys? It was a rare occasion that his friends didn’t end up on his couch crying over a pint of ice cream while explaining about some guy who broke their heart because he was “straight.” Each and every time Damian swore to himself he wouldn’t be like his friends. Yet, what did he do?
It took him a couple of hours of sitting on the couch, surrounded by his friends and their animals for the depression to lift enough that he was able to start thinking clearly. Damian couldn’t guess how many times over the last few months he had thought about moving to someplace new but maybe now was the time. The time to start over.
Jerking out of his thoughts at the sound of someone knocking on the door, Damian covered his nuts as Noah jumped on top of him from his place curled up against Damian’s legs, barking with excitement of another visitor. Unable to stop the laughter from bubbling out of his mouth at Noah’s excitement while both cats took off running in opposite directions Damian didn’t realize who had walked into the house until Crono ran straight towards him.
Wiping the slobber off of his face while Crono wiggled with excitement bouncing from one to the other, until he was satisfied with the amount of wet puppy kisses he had given each of them.
“Uh… Hey guys,” Terek said looking everywhere but at Damian. This was the first time they had seen each other, which was a feat considering they worked at the same casino and managed to completely avoid one another. Damian could feel the tension levels rise the longer Terek stood there with his nerves written all over his face.
With his mind racing with different solutions Damian opened his mouth, “Hey man, how’s it going? Come on in. We’re just watching a movie before ordering dinner.” Someone had to break the ice, so it might as well have been him.
“Nah, I just wanted to stop by and say hi. Crono and I were out for a walk. I’ll… um… let you guys get back to your movie.”
Before Terek could turn around to open the door Doctor Ali decided to come out to play again. “Chicken shit.” If Damian hadn’t been so surprised he would have laughed at the twin looks of shock on Terek’s and Dillon’s faces.
“Excuse me? What the hell, Ali?”
“I said you’re a chicken shit. All set to hang out until you see Damian is here, so instead you are going to tuck your tail and run, like a chicken shit. Too afraid to man up. Who gives a flying fuck that you guys had sex. I mean come on, from all of the sounds coming from the guest room that night and trust me ninety percent of them were from you, you were enjoying every second of it. Get the fuck over the damned label of being straight, bi, or gay, and just go for what feels good.”
Watching all the different emotions cross Terek’s face as Ali berated him left Damian feeling bad for the guy. Sure, the way he had started their little sexcapaid was wrong because Terek had been asleep but once he woke up and understood what was going on, he’d seemed fine with it as long as they didn’t get caught. Yet, they did.
Maybe, what he needed to do was clear the air between the two of them. Damian didn’t want things to be awkward anytime they all hung out so maybe they could come to an agreement of some sorts. But would Terek be willing to talk to him?
Silence filled the room as no one said anything against Ali’s tirade. Once the shock wore off of Terek’s face, he softly called for Crono before attaching his leash and walking out the door without saying another word. The guilt that instantly filled Damian’s stomach not only surprised but hurt.
A quick glance of the hurt on both Ali’s and Dillon’s faces had Damian jumping off of the couch before racing for the door. Quickly looking right then left Damian spotted Terek walking away from the house with his shoulders hunched over and his head hanging low.
Running after Terek, Damian wasn’t sure if he should hollar the man's name or just chase after him so he waited until he was just behind Terek before calling his name. “Terek! Wait up, man.” By the time he was able to catch up with Terek he was surprised to realize just how fast Terek had been moving as they were already at least a block and a half away.
“Look man. I’m sorry. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t hang out with Ali and Dillon if I am there or vise versa. We were all friends before this happened and I would like to still think we all still are,” Damian hoped he was making since but all of his thoughts were so jumbled in his head that he wasn’t positive. “You should be able to expect your best friends to tell you the truth one hundred percent of the time rather than telling you what you want to hear.”
“Damian, just stop,” Terek finally interrupted. “Look, I know you are trying to help me but dude, I didn’t even know you were bi and then we had sex - amazing sex - and now I’m forced to re-evaluate everything I thought I knew about myself. Do you have any idea how hard that is? To question yourself and who you thought you were after just one night?”
Damian could remember when he was a teenager and questioning his sexuality for the first time. He battled with it all through high school and into his twenties. He lost count over the years of how many people gave him grief about being bi, saying it was like the saying, “having your cake and eating it too.”
“Terek, I wish had a magic answer for you. Something to make everything crystal clear in your mind but I don’t. This is something you have to figure out on your own but if you want to just hang out and see where it goes or how you feel then I’m here for you. In the end only you can decide for yourself.”
Crono chose that very moment to lunge towards a neighborhood cat, knocking Terek against Damian’s body, shocking both of them. Staring into Terek’s green depths Damian watched as Terek’s pupils dilated with each second they stared at the other. Before he could even think of something to say or even consider pulling away, Terek pressed his lips against Damian’s.
After everything that had happened between them the last thing Damian would have expected would have been Terek taking control and kissing him. Especially out in the middle of the street where anyone could see. Maybe things would be alright between the two of them after all.
As the slow kiss came to an end Terek pulled away, surprise and shock written all over his face. “So, um… would you like to walk with me? I was going to take Crono around the neighborhood.”
In that very moment with the shy look on Terek’s face, Damian fell just a little bit. He knew it wouldn’t take much more for him to fall head over heels in love with Terek if he was given half a chance. So with a smile on his face Damian pulled his phone out of his pocket to text Ali and Dillon that he’d be back in a little bit before extending his arm for Terek to start walking.
To Be Continued….
DOCTOR TROUBLES X2
Thomas Wolfenson made a decision ten years ago that he thought was for the best of everyone involved, instead it has haunted his every step. Even his wolf refuses to come forth after the bad decision was made. However, a call sends Tommy rushing home, but what he finds when he gets there not only shocks him, it has the potential to change his life forever. Kyle has grown up with the knowledge his fated mate never wanted him. But when he shows up making a claim on him, Kyle struggles with the sudden change in his fated mate. Afraid that if he gives his heart it will be broken once again. Is Thomas strong enough to right the wrongs that were made long ago? And when the caller who sent him home is revealed, does it cost Tommy more than he ever thought he could lose? Or does fate allow a second chance, offering him more than he ever thought or wished for in his life?
Buy Link: https://www.amazon.com/Doctor-Troubles-Cascade-Pack-Book-ebook/dp/B016JVQIRC/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1484034935&sr=8-2&keywords=lei+carol
Welcome to my author biography. Short and sweet.
I love writing about the men in my books and meeting their personalities. The stories we create together make for very lifelike and relatable experiences. For the most part, my books exist in the Lei Carol multi-verse but can line up with some of my influences and real life (but not much). Each story I bring to life has its own trials and tribulations. Pick up one today. My personal favorite is Unlocking the Past.
Currently I live in Southern Oregon with my two cats, Outkazt & Torilei (sounds like Torilie not Torilee) but am in the works to hopefully make a big move this year. I am always amused by my muse and what he finds as inspiration. Anything and everything is up for grabs when it comes to my muse.
More often than not I can be found sitting at the kitchen table, headphones plugged into my computer with Pandora playing, a large cup of coffee next to me growing cold while I try to ignore what ever distraction tactics my cats are deploying.
Feel free to contact me by email, twitter or facebook. I’m usually always around either on my computer or phone.https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100008354955053